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Joke of the Day

"DIE HARD JOKE What are they planning on calling the next die hard movie in which the main villain is a lesbian terrorist? DYKE HARD"

"Civil War Jokes you say? I General Lee don't find them funny"

"When you put the punchline in the title... How do you ruin a joke?"

"Buying a new phone is basically being forced into a not so fun game of ""how long can I go without dropping it."" Same thing with babies."

"I am opening a restaurant called ""Peace and Quiet"" A kid meal is 250"

"will you marry me? no, marry Christmas!"

"What's the difference between Trump and Hitler? Hitler never raped a 13 year old."

"What do homeless people get for Christmas? Hypothermia."

"[At a bar] Guy: Did it hurt? Me: What? G: When you fell walking in. I saw you fall on your face. Everyone saw."

"Dark humor never gets old. Just like children in Africa."