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Joke of the Day

"What do you get if 2 black men sleep in a sleeping bag? A twix bar"

"Boss made me put a nametag over my left bosom. I leaned over and said, ""Now, what shall we name the other one?"""

"I used to steal jokes I still do, but I used to too"

"Me: Sometimes you need to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, enfarcorate, and move on. You know what I'm saying? Friend: ..."

"I hate people that can't tell the difference between ""you're"" and ""your"" their so stupid"

"Feminist Picnic... No sandwiches were made."

"I'm emotionally constipated I haven't given a shit in days."

"What did the Buddhist monk say when he approached the hotdog stand? Make me one with everything."

"Employer: ""In this job we need someone who is responsible."" Applicant: ""I'm the one you want. On my last job every time anything went wrong they said I was responsible."""

"*girl rests her head on my shoulder* -Are you flexing? -No"