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Joke of the Day
"I'm emotionally constipated I haven't given a shit in days."
Next Joke
"Man of Steel question. When young Clark Kent was wearing a cape in the yard, who was he pretending to be? Liberace?"
"What is a joke that so stupid that is actually funny? There was a thread months ago but i lost it..."
"I like to wear latex gloves to the doctor. Then he knows I can quickly retaliate if he gets too handsy."
"A priest asked a convicted murderer at the electric chair: ""Do you have any last requests?"" ""Yes,"" replied the murderer ""will you please hold my hand?"""
"Men are like buses, they won't text me back."
"How's a divorce like a hurricane... There's a bunch of sucking and blowing, but in the end she takes your house."
"Anyone know a Minecraft interpreter? I don't understand my son's Christmas list."
"My girlfriend said to me ""as a young boy, was your mother very strict with you"" and I said ""let's make one thing absolutely clear..."" ""My mother was never a young boy."" Tim Vine"
"Put yourself in my shoes for a minute... ...Now you're a mile away, and you have my shoes!"