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Joke of the Day
"Some guy yesterday wanted to get all up in my grill... ... So I hit him with my truck."
Next Joke
"next year big pixar movie for kids: follow the journey of a single tear down an old womans face as she learns her grandson died in a fire"
"Why do we never take the time to thank mislabeled concrete? It's mistaken for granite."
"Guy walks into a bar Metal bar. Ouch"
"Just took a power nap on a park bench. Made $7.30 in change."
"Eternal Life And the Lord said unto John, 'Come forth and receive eternal life,' But lo, John came fifth, and won a toaster."
"Vodka giveth and vodka taketh away... It giveth me a hangover and taketh away my underpants. Amen."
"What makes for a good first date? NOT MOVIES"
"Rose: I'm so cold. Jack: Listen, Rose. You're gonna get out of here, you're gonna go on and- fine, you can have my damn hoodie"
"What's up? The price of pussy. (My math teacher in high school use to say this one, he was cool.)"