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Joke of the Day

"I've got my girlfriend working on her gag reflex... ...I haven't got a big dick or anything, she just throws up when she sees me naked"

"If a tree falls in the woods.... .....and no one is around to hear it. Will a hipster buy the soundtrack?"

"There are Three Rings to Marriage The Engagement Ring The Wedding Ring And The Suffering"

"First Date: ""So, tell me something no one else knows about you."" Well, my wife thinks I'm at the movies and you think I'm single."

"Did you ever get two pieces of shocking news at once? I just found out my sister was diagnosed with testicular cancer."

"Man asks blonde for coffee without cream. Blonde replies: ""We're out of cream. Would you prefer coffee without milk instead?"""

"Pretty cool that the letters ""B.J."" stand for the two greatest things in the world: beef jerky & Billy Joel."

"I heard a great Ray Rice joke... but I can't remember the punchline."

"TIL: To never trust a fart."

"My buddy tells me he had sex with his GF and her twin the other night. I asked him how he told them apart. He says, ""well her brother has a mustache"""