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Joke of the Day
"Rohypnol......."
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"I definitely learned my lesson about speeding today and it will never happen again. I didn't get pulled over or anything, I just showed up to work 20 minutes early."
"you have heard ""A pint is a pound"" ... .. and that is a seriously high petrol price. I know. It's not that good. Nor even that funny. But it's coming. Happy Halloween."
"Did you hear about the midget psychic who escaped from prison? He's a small medium at large."
"I just don't get you people who prefer the cold over the heat. The best times of my life are spent being hot, sweaty, and naked. Not cold, shivering, and bundled up."
"BAD LAWYER Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad? A: Senator."
"(Xpost: showerthoughts) Knock-knock jokes should win the No-Bell Prize"
"Why are there no female serial killers ?? Because after the first kill, they have to tell someone."
"Did you hear about the blonde woman who has three hours of footage of raw chicken on her iPhone? The cooking instructions said remove sleeve and film."
"What's the difference between Santa Clause and Tiger Woods? Santa stops at 3 ho's."