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Joke of the Day

"So I, (male) have a Girlfriend with a schoolgirl fantasy... The only problem is...I fell uncomfortable wearing the dress. Stole from the office. S3E21"

"What's the difference between everybody and bullets? Everybody misses Harambe."

"You can tell your life sucks when you run into traffic and the cars go around you."

"Where do comedian Eskimos live? A Giggloo."

"Why does nobody like a rich stone? Because he takes everything for granite."

"I do this really cute thing, where if I walk by a car that has a stick figure family on their back window, I peel a kid off."

"How does a fallopian tube take its eggs? (Ovaries Z)"

"Life is a lot like a piece of toilet paper. You're either on a roll, or you're taking shit from some asshole."

"I went to an owl party last night. Contrary to my expectations it wasn't very much fun at all."

"What's the smartest piece of lab equipment? A graduated cylinder."