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Joke of the Day

"The only thing better than iPad... ...is an iTampon."

"A German asks for a martini... ""Dry?"" asks the barman. He replies, ""Nein, just one."""

"Kids are scared to pour vinegar in their cups because BAKING SODA. BAKING SODA. I GOT BAKING SODA"

"I spend a lot of time contemplating the mysteries of life, like why the wall the natives built to keep Kong out had a Kong-sized door in it."

"What book did the rabbit take on vacation? One with a hoppy ending."

"I figured out I'm autosapiosexual. I just came to this conclusion."

"We all sprang from apes, but you didn't spring far enough."

"An atheist, christian, and a scientologist walk into a bar. The atheist and christian then beat the ever living shit out of the scientologist for being so damn stupid."

"Kids should think twice about threatening to run away from home. It only fills their parents with false hope."

"We can land a rover on freakin Mars but still no single-button to push for the _()_/ emoji"