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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Chinese kangaroo turn red? Because it was making a Great Leap Forward."

"Joke about a psychic and water Something something clairboyant Can't be bothered to actually write a joke but the essence is here."

"What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber? Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar"

"Whoever coined the term Downward Spiral should have made it sound a lot less fun."

"I exercise at the gym because I can't exercise restraint when it comes to everything that's bad for me."

"""The club can't even handle me right now."" What, like structurally? Should we call an engineer? Evacuate? Advise."

"A hipster burnt his tongue Drinking coffee before it was cool."

"Met two guys named Andre coincidentally It was a real double ent""andre"""

"My mom asked me a question and when I went to answer she said, ""Hold on I can't hear you. I gotta turn on the light."" The dark was too loud?"

"GF: ""I'm telling you now! Size does not matter, it doesn't make you any less important."" BF: ""Yeah? Well explain that to Pluto."""