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Joke of the Day

"Why did the can crusher quit his job? It was soda pressing."

"NHK reported on the massive American erection yesterday... and apparently there will be a bigger one in two years."

"If I got a boyfriend I wouldn't know what to do... What do they eat? How often do they need to be walked? Can they be house trained?"

"What was Hitler's favorite letter? I have no idea, but it was probably NOT Z."

"Customer: I thought the meals here were supposed to be like mother used to make. Waiter: They are. She couldn't cook either."

"How does a sailor suit? With a bowtie!"

"Son: Dad, what does 'gay' means?... Father: It means 'to be happy'. &nbsp; Son: Are you gay? &nbsp; Father: No, son. I have a wife."

"Purchasing a rain barrel often leads to buying more water collecting devices I guess you could say a rain barrel is a gateway jug. (Modified from a story heard on NPR) : )"

"Knock knock. Who's there? Panther. Panther who? Panther no panth I'm going thwimming."

"People who say ""the future is now"" don't understand how time works."