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Joke of the Day
"ADHD is ADD in high definition."
Next Joke
"Kids these days don't give a fuck about acid They're all about that base. Credit to /u/Assorted_Jellymemes"
"Did you hear Tarantino is making a documentary about the Catholic Church? It's called Pulpit Fiction"
"Success, like a fart, only bothers people when its not their own."
"What's the number one cause of pedophilia? sexy kids"
"At what age do you tell your kids that the UN isn't real"
"You wanna take this outside bro? You sure bro? It's awfully chilly bro. Hold on bro, let me grab my scarf."
"Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink. He sips it for a while, and when he is finished, the bartender asks him if he'd like another. Descartes says, ""I think not"", and disappears."
"*Invents silent snack packages. *Becomes president of the United States."
"""hello pretty lady."" [i slide down the bar] ""what's your name?"" i say as i casually toss a peanut in my eye."