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Joke of the Day

"Some guy said I wear as much makeup as a clown so I'm under his bed with a knife. That's what clowns do, right?"

"Why does a chicken coop only have 2 doors? Because if it had 4 doors, it would be a chicken sedan!"

"I needed a password 8 characters long .. .. so I used Snow White and the Seven Dwarves"

"A brief guide to small talk: Read someone's t-shirt out loud to them. Ask what it means. Casually flick their nipple. Ask where they got it."

"I think instead of ""LOL""....I'm gonna go with ""SALTS"" (Smiled a little then stopped). Its more truthful."

"ME: [in santa costume, covered in chimney soot] that was hard. how does santa do it WIFE: well santas not real, hun ME: [drops cookie] WHAT"

"If I had a nickel for every time I had sex... ... I'd be a very cheap hooker."

"My friend can only masturbate when he listens to really bad music. Beats off."

"For what I assume is a gambling channel, BET sure has a lot of black people."

"So a guy comes into my bar for a beer... I give it to him and he says, ""Hey! There's a fly in this!"" Embarrassed I look and say, ""Oh no, that's just Gnatty Lite."""