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Joke of the Day
"How do you know your girlfriend is getting fat? She starts to fit into your wife's clothes."
Next Joke
"A lesbian couple asked me if I would like to make them parents. I never thought adoption could be so exciting."
"I just got a job cleaning air ducts and I don't like it very much, but at least I have a job. Thanks for letting me vent."
"Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving? It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China."
"What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne? Acne doesn't come onto a boy's face until he's 13."
"Worst pick-up line ever. If you're looking for a stud, I've got the STD all that's missing is U."
"[around campfire] ME: *grabs guitar* Hey kids how about a song? KIDS: Yeah! ME: ok *clears throat* LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR LET THE BODI"
"What's green and has wheels? Grass... I lied about the wheels"
"What do Kermit the Frog and David Cameron Have in Common? They both like to pork."
"Back in WW2 I used to be a seaman... Now I just put it all over my wife's ass."