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Joke of the Day

"My husband wants a fourth child. I hope his new wife will be good to my three."

"Have you ever met a vegan that does crossfit? Oh you'd know if you had."

"To the idiots who say ghosts aren't real, maybe you should watch this documentary called Ghostbusters."

"I once called my teacher mom I was home schooled"

"There's a lot of speculation about the new iPhone. It's expected to have a larger screen and a better operating system. Yes, the new iPhone will be called last year's Samsung Galaxy."

"Imagine you know a guy named Gary, & Gary calls his car the Garymobile & insists that you do, too. What I'm saying is Batman is a douche"

"What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang up a picture of Jesus."

"I love the gym this time of year. The newbies make me look like a Victoria Secret model."

"I just shook my keyboard upside down. Breakfast is served."

"I got free pancakes on International Pancake Day. International Women's Day is now almost over and I think I like pancake day better."