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Joke of the Day
"What sound does a Nintendo Ambulence make? Wii U, Wii U, Wii U, Wii U."
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"The Foo Fighters did a really good job, because I haven't had to deal with any Foo in years."
"Why was the beach wet? Because the sea-weed."
"What do you call a Mexican Standoff between two people? Juan vs. Juan"
"Too many girls want attention, not enough want respect!"
"Where do you find a birthday present for a cat? In a cat-alogue!"
"What's the difference between an onion and a hooker? I cry when I cut up onions"
"An old man goes to the doctor... Man: Doc, my belly is so fat I can't see my penis at all! Doctor: Have you tried to diet? Man: Why? What color is it now?"
"[Airport Bar] Me: I'll have a beer, please. Bartender: That'll be $45. Me: Worth it."
"A developer tried to pull weeds out of his garden... But he didn't have root access."