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Joke of the Day
"If I had a crystal ball, I'd probably walk differently."
Next Joke
"What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever."
"What do you call a Jew with a pH lower than 7? ....hasidic I'll let myself out now. I know that was matzo good..."
"On a bad dinner date? Bump the table with your knee to make the water in your glass ripple. Claim a T-Rex is coming. Sprint out the door."
"Why are fat people like relationships? Most of them don't work out."
"What do you get when you breed a rabbit with an elephant? A dead rabbit with a beat-up asshole."
"Right now Chuck Norris' pumpkin is carving itself"
"MC HAMMER: U can't touch this! ... U can't touch this! MASSAGE THERAPIST: Please just let me do my job Mr. Hammer! MC HAMMER: U can't tou..."
"[Maroon 4 meeting] Adam Levine: ""Our band name sucks"" Drummer that no one knows the name of: ""let's think bigger"" Adam: ""I've got it"""
"What is ISIS's favorite type of text? Is the answer: A: Heading B: Heading C: Heading"