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Joke of the Day

"Meant to type ""Lmaoooo"" but left off the ""L"" and now she thinks I'm singing the praises of The People's Republic."

"Great news! I'm declaring a national strike. Nobody go to work."

"How do you cut the sea in half? With a seesaw (I'll see myself out)"

"Boss: John, tell me your greatest weakness Me: Honesty B: I don't think that's a weakness M: I don't give a shit what you think."

"My life-long rival just beat my record for deep-sea diving! This is a new low..."

"What's the difference between a black dad and a elevator? A elevator can raise a kid"

"I get high before I get my Drivers License pic taken. That way I look normal if I'm pulled over."

"What is Shulk from Xenoblade's favorite thing to type? Back Slash!"

"Greatest joke ever !!! My life"

"A jewish kid asks his dad for $20 His dad replies: $10!?!... What do you need $5 for?"