222060

Joke of the Day

"How do you cut the sea in half? With a seesaw (I'll see myself out)"

"I keep hearing people say it was just a bad situation and the Gator was hungry. They found the body intact, guess the gator couldn't have been that hungry."

"Why don't blind people skydive? It scares the fuck out of the dogs."

"What do you call a jellyfish on a plane? A flightoplankton."

"How do you stay warm outside in the winter? You just stand in a corner, they are usually around 90 degrees."

"I just realized Alaska has some really weird city names Did Juneau that?"

"My grandfather was treated very badly by the Germans in WW2. Passed over for promotion time and time again."

"Announced sternly to students today that ""only hard things are worth doing!"" In other news, I have a bunch of parent emails to respond to."

"My cat jumped off me unexpectedly, so I get it, Europe. I get it."

"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity **It's impossible to put down**"