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Joke of the Day

"Decks. Because I like to be outdoors, but not like all on the ground and shit."

"The Coal Industry... ... has come under fire lately."

"What's worse than a moron? A lessoff."

"While I'm shopping at Costco my kids wait by the exit and try to get adopted by a wealthy family."

"Dear sneeze, if you're gonna happen, happen. Don't put a stupid look on my face and then just leave."

"I heard a joke about corn the other day. It was amaizeing"

"There are two reasons I would never drink from a toilet Number 1, and number 2"

"Even maintaining a Sims character is too much pressure for me."

"When the farmer counted his cows he had 196, but when he rounded them up he had 200!"

"Salary is like a period you wait for it a whole month and it ends in a week."