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Joke of the Day

"Why do the birthers...? Why do the Birthers care about where Barack Obama was born (Hawaii, not Kenya) and not where Ted Cruz was born (Canada, not Texas)? Because Barack Obama is black."

"What did Donald Trump do in Musical theatre? ^^^(jazz-hands)"

"i hope the guy behind me in line doesn't think i'm a weird cat lady cause my cart's full of fancy feast. i just like the way it tastes, dude"

"My password is not working Put numbers in uppercase."

"Why does an inspiring sight like a sunrise always have to take place at such an inconvenient time?"

"A roofie? .. but how does a roof take a picture of itself? I'm so confused."

"How did one tire get the attention of another tire? pssssssssssst"

"If a girl texts you and asks if you think she's fat and you try to respond ""Nooo"" autocorrect changes it to ""Moo"" so that's pretty cool."

"For some people, blood on the toothbrush is a sign of gum disease.... ...But for me it's a sign of a healthy abortion."

"Why didn't the piece of paper move out of the way when a car came speeding towards it? Because it was stationary."