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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I wonder if I need to spell it out to people.. But then I realised I typed it, so I already did spell it out."

"What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? We better get some support before they think we're nuts!"

"I laid back last night and admired the sky above me, taking in the beauty of the universe when it hit me... Where the fuck is my roof?"

"Yeah, I'm allergic to wheat, but I really like it so I eat it anyway. I'm a real gluten for punishment."

"Why did Obama serve two terms? Because blacks always get a longer sentence"

"My 4yo just noticed me trying to throw out an old, wrecked piece of Lego & by the look he gave me I'm afraid to go to sleep now."

"I know someone that was frozen to absolute zero once. He was 0K."

"6-year-old: *finds a picture she drew* Why was this in the trash? Me: 6: Me: It was too good. I didn't want to make your sisters jealous."

"A black man takes a girl home from a nightclub... ...She says ""Show me it's true what they say about black men"". So he stabs her & nicks her purse."

"well, 75% of you passed math and will not have to come to summer school [from the back] ""what about the other 65% of us?"""