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Joke of the Day

"It's called PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken."

"My buddy's PRETTY drunk... So I took the car key off of his keychain... He's been trying to start his car with a house key for 4 hours now"

"So many girls look so cute and pretty when they cry then there's me where i look like a dying horse"

"Working with underprivileged children is really rewarding because I get to tell people about it."

"Have you ever seen the movie called ""Constipated""? Well it never came out."

"[1st day in heaven] God: Welcome! Have a taco and a shot of tequila. Do you like music? Me: Yeah. G: How about a little, *giggles* Nirvana?"

"What's a neckbeard's favourite country? M'laysia"

"Sex is a lot like pizza. How? Let me tell you about the worst pizza I ever had: It was fantastic."

"My grandpa believes he is best friends with Freud. But I keep telling him he is just a Sigmund of his imagination."

"Why was Cleopatra so negative? Because she was queen of denial."