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Joke of the Day
"If the 2008 election was about Hope and Change, what is 2016? Fear and Loathing."
Next Joke
"Wild horses could easily drag me away. Probably a good sized dog or motivated cat could do the trick. A big bunch of gerbils, maybe."
"What did one earring say to the other? You go on a head, i'll just hang round 'ere"
"I shoveled half my driveway yesterday but my wife's still not happy because it just so happens to be the top half the sun melted."
"What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake of course!"
"The Past, Present and Future walk into a bar It was tense."
"""Wow, I haven't showered since last year!"" ""Haha good one, but it's not the new year yet"" ""I know..."""
"Life of a chef must suck. All your work eventually turns to shit."
"How can you tell if a hippie has been in your house? ...he's still there"
"What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer."