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Joke of the Day

"DID YOU KNOW? You can feed a lot of squirrels into those pneumatic tubes at the bank before the teller finds the shut-off switch."

"How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints!"

"Whats the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted"

"I'm leaving for London tomorrow. It's going to be really weird Tweeting from the left hand side of the road."

"What do you call people who use the pull out method? Parents"

"Kissing someone mid sentence is only cute in movies. I will press my hand against your face and slowly push it way until I'm done talking."

"At first I was worried about my eyesight, but my doctor said I was fine. As a matter of fact, he said that in 5 years I should have 20-20 vision!"

"In a recent survey into blow jobs, and why men like them so much 6% liked the feeling, 12% liked the excitement and 82% just like the peace and quiet."

"What side dishes did Jesus eat at the last supper? Peas and hominy."

"Why a pirate could not spell iris? He had only one 'i'"