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Joke of the Day

"Honey I Shrunk the Kids IV: They shrink everyone on earth on purpose The planet will never run out of resources Everyone is eaten by ants"

"Does anyone see this? Test post please respond"

"Patient: Doctor every night i see ants playing football Doctor: It's okay take these pills Patient: No way tomorrow is the final"

"I often wonder how different it would be if I were to go back to grade school Not so much with the knowledge I have now, but with the penis I have now"

"My sister wanted to marry a man clever enough to make a lot of money but dumb enough to spend it on her !"

"what did one lesbian vampire say to the other? same time next month? (hopefully not a repost)"

"Apparently, having sex with a condom... is not as good as having sex with a person."

"Got a case for my iPhone even though the screen is already cracked. So basically it's like putting a condom on my kid's head."

"Life is like a penis. Simple, relaxed and hanging around freely... It's women who make it hard."

"I refuse to jump on the I hate Mondays' bandwagon. I hate all workdays equally"