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Joke of the Day

"I made this up when i was 10... Whats a frogs favorite restaurant? IHOP!!!"

"So I called Amazon customer support to try and get credit for a late package. They said no. They cut me down in my Amazon Prime."

"DAD: I can't believe you bought me a house for Christmas SON: I hope you enjoy it DAD: I'm just gonna... SON: Oh no DAD: Live in the present"

"I went to get a physical the other day... And the doctor told me that I had to stop masturbating. Shocked, I asked him ""why?"" He said I had to stop because he was giving me a physical."

"People who failed committing suicide... How do they live with themselves?"

"How many porn stars does it take to turn change a fuse? It's too hard to tell. They keep blowing it."

"What do you call a Jamaican proctologist? A Pokemon."

"Beer:""You know what would be funny?"" Me:""No. What?"" Beer:""Really? Finish me and have four more then I'll ask again."" Me:""Yes, sir."""

"What will a monster eat in a restaurant? The waiter."

"Hey, Sean Bean, it's either Shaun Baun or Seen Been. You can't have it both ways."