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Joke of the Day

"Harry Potter is a kind of ""whodunnit"" book series and you-know-whodunnit..."

"My 6yo has been rolling around on the floor for 30 mins whining for me to get her some juice cause SHE doesn't want to Go ahead. Have kids"

"What did the candle say when it couldn't sleep due to his own candlelight? There ain't no rest for the wicked"

"What's the difference between period blood and sand? You can't gurgle sand."

"What was in those drums of chemicals Captain Malcolm Reynolds hid behind in Firefly? For-Mal-To-Hide."

"The 4 Stages of Going Out Drinking: 1. Why do I do this to myself 2. This isn't so bad 3. WE SHOULD DO THIS MORE OFTEN 4. Why do I do this to myself"

"I saw a sign at a drug rehab center It said ""Keep off the grass"""

"What does a Triceratops sit on? His Tricerabottom"

"Want to hear my favorite holocaust joke? Aw, schwitz! I forgot it :("

"Are you a computer whiz? it seems you know how to turn my software to hardware."