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Joke of the Day

"If you don't use a bottle opener to open your beer, you drink shitty beer."

"Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh."

"New Year's Resolution- Date more models... Edit: Date more Edit: Date again LAST Edit: Stop crying while masturbating"

"It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers."

"Why is Santa's sack so big? He only comes once a year!"

"What do you call four drowning spanish teachers? Cuatro sinko. ;)"

"I bet a girl that I could touch her boobs without touching her for $5. Paid her the $5 after I touched her boobs."

"toilet issues why did the dutch man have to get off the toilet? because it was all clogged up!"

"Sea World threw me out for trying to ride the manatee What's the big deal? It's not like I did it on porpoise!"

"Why are elephants big and grey? Because if they were small and purple, they would be called grapes."