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Joke of the Day

"On the street a person has a heart attack. Someone shouts: - Is there a doctor? Vegan: - I am a vegan."

"What song did Scar sing when he fixed his car horn? Beep repaired..."

"Why are black people so fast? Because all of the slow ones are in jail."

"If I had a dime for every time I didn't know what was going on... I'd be like, ""Why ya'll keep giving me all these dimes?"""

"(Standing next to pool with a golf club and horse) Friends: Are you sure you've played water polo before?"

"Catch a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish (read the rest as Groucho Marx) and you'll never see him on the weekends."

"I must be emotionally constipated ...because I haven't given a shit in days"

"I've wasted the best years of my life waiting for people to join conference calls."

"Why did Dave Grohl buy such a tall house? He wanted to make sure he was getting the best, the best, the best, the best-a view."

"I hate boxing But you gotta love May weather!"