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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a priest and a pedophile? A pedophile does not get tax exemptions for raping young boys."

"I've been watching so much porn lately that... I spit on my hot-dog before I put it on my bun..."

"Some people say that The Big Bang Theory disproves God... I mean, sure, it's not the best show, but I wouldn't go *that* far."

"How do you catch a polar bear? Cut a hole in the ice, take peas and put them around the hole. Now when he comes to take a pea, kick him in the icehole."

"my friend put me in charge of picking up the wedding cake today LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL RIP CAKE"

"What happens when Batman sees Catwoman? The Dark Knight Rises"

"I can count the number of times I've been to Chernobyl with one hand. It's 42."

"Baltimore CVS Looters They really cleaned the place out. The only things they left behind are sunscreen and Father's Day cards."

"Sometimes... when you cry ... no one sees your tears... sometimes... when you are happy... no one sees your smile... But fart just one time..."

"What's the difference between Barack Obama and a mark on a gift? One's a President and the other's a pressie dent. i'll see myself out."