80747
Joke of the Day
"I was addicted to the Hokey Pokey... But I turned myself around."
Next Joke
"Why Derrick Rose's Rape Allegations Won't Stick. ""Just like his knees, it won't hold up in court"""
"What do you call the space between Kim Kardashian's breasts and butt cheeks? Silicon Valley. [Source](https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/3h6bld/kim_kardashians_butt/)"
"What should you care? My grandfather always said, ""Don't watch your money, watch your health."" So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather."
"HER: I'd invite you in, but I never kill on a first date ME: kill? HER: haha I meant kiss stupid autocorrect ME: we are talking out loud"
"Every club is a strip club, if you have the money. Every zoo is a petting zoo, if you have the balls."
"My daddy always warned me about the 3 rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering."
"Sorry I'm late. I was trying to think of ways to get out of this."
"Why was the gymnast disqualified? He walked into a bar."
"Records have revealed that Hitler had a ""deformed micropenis""... A little ironic, since he's universally remembered for being a huge dick."