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Joke of the Day

"How many Scene kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Some obscure number, you've probably never heard of it"

"My friend asked me if the new Star Wars movie was in 3D I said yes, but they R2D2"

"Today somebody called me a model! Well they said ""poster boy for birth control"", but I knew what they meant."

"My roommate has a red face all the time. He says it's because of a skin condition but I think he's secretly appropiating native American culture."

"How often do Chinese people have elections? When they wake up every morning."

"I lost my job as a massage therapist. Apparently, I rub people the wrong way."

"Feeding your cat a vegan diet is actually pretty easy. The trick is to cut up the vegans in to very small chunks first."

"Which race eats the most watermelon? The human race, you racist asshole!"

"Cutest joke ever What does a red grape tell a purple grape? Breathe, you idiot! Breathe!!"

"Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand? So she can moan with the other."