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Joke of the Day

"What do you call an african american guy walking into the DMV? An african american guy walking into the DMV, you racist f#ck."

"Chuck Norris qualified with a top speed of 324 mph at the Daytona 500, without a car."

"If you are over 40, it's no longer called masturbation. It's called a system check."

"I want to open up a toupee shop. So when someone questions themselves about buying one, I can say, ""toupee or not toupee? That is the question."""

"What's black and red, flashes like hell and annoys men? Live Jasmine"

"Why did the Mexican push his wife off the cliff? Tequila"

"There's plenty of jobs in the porn industry when you have a dick like mine. Camera man, light and sound technician."

"[coworker starts talking to me at my cubicle] Welp, nice chatting. This is my stop. [puts in earbuds]"

"How many Star Trek captains does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, but there are FOUR LIGHTS!"

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Lion Tamer Barbie ...lion is included; Barbie's head is not"