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Joke of the Day

"Guy at door: How would you like to make a donation to our local orphanage? Dad: yea sure [yells up to me] son, you live with this guy now!"

"How much Viagra do you have to give a computer to turn its software into hardware? Just enough to completely fill up the floppy diks drive."

"Are you on a Wanted Poster, because you are sketchy as hell..."

"Comas make a big difference in a sentence. For example: Ben is in a hurry. Ben is in a coma."

"What did Matthew McConaughey say after voting for Trump? alt right, alt right, alt right"

"What's the difference between Whitney houston and my car? My car can make it to 50."

"A Little girl asked her father: Do all fairy tales begin with Once upon a time? Father: No, some begin with - If elected I promise.."

"""Welcome to Fight Club,"" said the man with the rock hard abs. I looked around, clutching my kite, becoming worried."

"Two fish are in a tank One turns to the other and asks, ""Do you know how to drive this?"""

"I think Mondays were invented to punish us for all the fun we have on the weekends!"