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Joke of the Day

"If you don't come to my funeral, then I won't go."

"I used to think I had an ass that prison inmates would die for, now, I don't know."

"I hope the people that monitor my sleep study tonight like watching a man scratch his taint."

"Boss: Why put off until tomorrow what you can do today? Me: It'll be higher quality and less tense for everyone if we wait? Boss: Today!"

"What do you call sheep in the Middle East? Arak of lamb"

"Why did the cowboy get a dachshund? Because he wanted to get a long little doggy :)"

"What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven."

"How much does it cost a pirate to get his ear pierced? A buccaneer!"

"I've lost my boyfriend! He's in one of these browser tabs, somewhere."

"Knock Knock! Who's there... No one because you have no friends."