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Joke of the Day

"For years I thought that my wife was repulsed by me but as it turns out she just doesn't put out on the first marriage."

"Cannibals like to eat... vegetables"

"The difference between a brown noser and an ass kisser is depth perception."

"What did King Kong say when he saw the Statue of Liberty? Are you my mother?"

"What's small, orange and sounds like a parrot? An oompa loompa with a sore throat."

"Everyone is wondering if Biden will jump into the 2016 race He's just Biden his time."

"If the Powerball has taught me anything, it's how to turn $200 into $4."

"Why are electric trains like a mother's breasts? They were both designed for the kids but it's the fathers who are always playing with them."

"Everyone seems worried about global warming and world hunger... ...but the real crisis is that one day elderly drivers will know how to text."

"What is the oldest red wine? ""They took our Land!"""