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Joke of the Day

"Tattoo idea: One Jonas Brothers face on each thigh. What? There's three? Okay, and one right in the middle. How do you spell Kevin?"

"What's the difference between Victoria Taylor and Arnold Schwarzenegger? One was fired, the other was terminated"

"When the doctor told me that he had fitted a thermostat instead of a pacemaker, I was livid. It made my blood boil."

"I just told my wife I am getting her a monkey for her birthday. She went bananas."

"Little Sally walks into the kitchen and finds a naked guy there. ""Are you the new babysitter?"" she asks. ""No I am the new motherfucker."" the man replies."

"What did the philosopher say to his coworker? ""Cleanup on the detergent aisle"""

"My boss has stopped letting me leave early for my son's Little League games ever since he learned he's in his second year of college."

"In MILF porn... There's always one motherfucker"

"Why do Belgians eat their french fries out of a funnel? They never want to lose a brown one once they've been burned"

"What do you call the study of food prices? EcoNOM-NOM-NOMics."