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Joke of the Day
"In Australia your best friend and your worst enemy are both called a.. Cunt"
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"What do you call a witch who kills her mother and father? An orphan."
"I'm more than tenacious. I'm elevenacious."
"Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered 6 offender"
"What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam"
"My wife spent two weeks deciding what color to paint the bathroom. I got a cat on my 9th birthday and named it Cat."
"I woke my wife one night and said ""The force is awakening."" She replied, ""Not tonight Hand Solo."""
"When you get to your wit's end, You'll find God lives there."
"I feel like if there ever was a zombie apocalypse I'm so numb to them at this point I wouldn't even bat an eye."
"A hipster has just died Welcome to heaven, says god. The hipster turns back : no way, I'm going to hell before it's cool"