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Joke of the Day
"'Marley and Me' has a sequel! It's called 'Me'..."
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"Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand."
"Roman mythology in 3 words The fuck's plagiarism?"
"I hate the Nazis so much They make me goddamned Fuhrious!"
"It's really cold this year in Motown... Three Degrees... Four Tops"
"Father: When Abe Lincoln was your age he walked 9 miles to school and did homework by candlelight. Son: When Lincoln was your age he was President."
"Next time someone knocks on your bathroom stall say ""Sorry, I'm with a client."""
"My kids are really competing for least favorite today."
"A kiss makes my day Anal makes my hole weak"
"Today I masturbated 8 times! A personal record for me... In my defence Schindler's list was a long film"