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Joke of the Day

"A woman asks her friend, ""Is your husband circumcised?"" Her friend replies, ""No, he's a complete dick."""

"Apparently saying, ""You mad, bro?"" is frowned upon if you work in customer service."

"Your shirt is a little small. No, I am to big."

"Elon Musk's space travel corp. decided not to fund the recent reboot of Carrie, just because they were scared... I guess you could say it was a *Sissy SpaceX.*"

"I think I'm gonna make a bracelet that supports getting rid of bracelets that support stuff."

"I don't care about following a 'funny' celebrity from tv on Twitter-instead I look up who writes for their show then follow that person."

"I love donuts so much I want to marry them. But then I'm afraid I would eat all our donut hole children."

"Why was Thor disappointed by his birthday party? Because it was more Loki than he wanted."

"What do you call a weirdo slowly driving a jeep past an elementary school? Jeeper creeper!"

"That new movie, Daja Vu... Haven't I seen it before?"