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Joke of the Day

"Batman threw Two-Face at my car, and now it has a Harvey Dent"

"Please stop giving your dogs human names. My sons Buster & Lucky are getting pretty sensitive about this!"

"So I'm out in the woods taking a shit when... ...a bear strolls up, cocks his head with a funny expression, and says, ""I never knew you guys did that."""

"What's the difference between a dwarf and an STD? Ones a cunning runt the other is a running cunt."

"The supermarket ran out of soup. They were out of stock."

"Do you have home insurance? 'Cause I'm going to smash your back door in."

"World's Funniest Joke? Women's rights!"

"A feminist asked me how I saw lesbians. Apparently *in HD* wasn't the right answer."

"What does FUN stand for? Some nights, I don't know."

"When you get a brain freeze from a margarita you know you have problems"