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Joke of the Day
"Why can't you tell when a Pterodactyl goes to the toilet Becuase the P is silent"
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"I've never had angry sex. I'm always happy and quite surprised that it is actually happening."
"Not a single character in any horror or sci-fi film can possibly ever have watched even one horror or sci-fi film."
"i don't drink to forget, i drink to remember how much i like drinking."
"Every Taylor Swift song sounds like it was written in gel pen."
"What's the difference between a feminist studies major and a bench? A bench can support a family."
"[while titanic is sinking] me: [mouth full of shrimp at the buffet] I can't believe no one is eating these lol"
"A man walks into a bar and his name is JOHN CENAAAAAAAAAA!!!"
"How can you get out of a locked room with a piano in it? Play the piano until you find the right key."
"You know what really brings the child out in me? Abortion."