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Joke of the Day

"(Politics) If trump becomes president... And he identified as a female or got a sex change, would he then be the first woman president?"

"Did it hurt when you fell down from Heaven?"

"12 Polacks were about to rape a German girl. She started yelling ""Nein, nein, nein!"" so 3 of them left."

"The way to cure your loneliness is to get on out there! But first, be better looking. And stop being yourself, that's obviously not working."

"Your momma so fat... She needs cheat codes for Wii Fit."

"Why did the rock band get in serious treble? They failed on a consistent bassist."

"I finally figured out what flies and mosquitoes are for. They're gods way of making us slap ourselves."

"I met a Japanese mathematician yesterday Japanese Mathematician: ""Acknowledge my presence, zero"" Me: ""Can you elaborate in mathematical terms?"" Japanese Mathematician: ""Notice me sin(pi)"""

"What's brown and rhymes with 'snoop?' Dr. Dre"

"""Yo dog, this yogurt is mad delicious."" -Me, eating yogurt, and talking to my dog. I'm gonna die alone aren't I?"