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Joke of the Day

"12 Polacks were about to rape a German girl. She started yelling ""Nein, nein, nein!"" so 3 of them left."

"A feminist, a crossfitter, and a vegan are all sitting at a bar... and I only know this because they won't shut the fuck up about it."

"Which two farm animals are the dirtiest? Brown chicken brown cow.."

"If you can't handle me at my un-shaved, you don't deserve me at my waxed."

"Damn girl, are you bubble wrap? Because you're fun to run over with my bike"

"I care more about the outcome of sporting events than any other aspect of human existence."

"I just got a part in the movie Cocaine It only has one line."

"Dodged the bullet A girl asked me today if she is wearing too much make-up. I told her my reply depends on whether or not she intends to kill Batman."

"If you had bad legs, why wouldn't you want to be a college professor? Because you never sitty down!"

"What did the alien say to the gardener? Take me to your weeder."