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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend complained about me moving on too fast."
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"Why is everyone so obsessed with the idea of love? If you're dying to be hurt so badly, I've got a baseball bat for that."
"I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day."
"Why was Osama Bin Laden obsessed with Eminem? He was an Afghani-Stan."
"I use these ( ... ) a lot. For which, I believe, the technical term is Dotty Dot Dots."
"How does the moon cut his hair? 'Eclipse it."
"Jewish If a Jew celebrates christmas they're only Jewish."
"What do you call the student with the best overall average in a graduating class at an all girl's school? vulvavictorian"
"At this point, I'm pretty sure the main reason Donald Trump ran for president was to get more Twitter followers"
"What did the depressed terrorist say to the passengers on the plane he hijacked? I'm sorry to bring you all down."