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Joke of the Day

"Ms. Pac-Man should only cost 70% of a quarter per play"

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"What's the difference between hardware and software? Hardware breaks if you*don't* maintain it."
"*tries to get a life. Life: I have a girlfriend."
"How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? 16, one to change the bulb, and 15 to form a support group."
"Why shouldn't you use red, white, and blue paint in a watercolor? Because these colors don't run"
"Everyone knows that your eyebrows are drawn on, we just wish you'd make them lightning bolts once in a while."
"What is the difference between a well dressed man on a bicycle and a poorly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire."
"Subway kid: Would you like your sandwich toasted? Me: No, I'm toasted enough for both us. In fact I'm kind of hoping it can drive me home."
"What do you call a plant getting kidney surgery? A transplant"
"If you know I'm I the car and you continue to text me, you basically want me dead..."