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Joke of the Day

"A percussionist tells his fellow percussionists some puns His group laughs at every pun he makes. He asks a friend: Hey, are my puns a tenor what?"

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"What's the expiry date on plastic? [81](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/UYwYdFdoecA/0.jpg)"
"Why does a giraffe need such a long neck? Because its head is so far away from its body."
"Its disgusting and derogatory to call a gay man a fruit How could something so pure and sweet be compared to a homosexual!!!"
"What do Bernie Sanders and the Statue of Liberty have in common? Common people sent both of them pennies to help build a foundation for liberty."
"Two peanuts walk into an elevator One was Ray Rice and the other was assaulted."
"What's the difference between an old cat and a little kitten? An old cat will bite and scratch, but a little pussy never hurt anybody."
"What does the Mafia and pussies have in common? One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit"
"Ferguson Protestors looted a Payless Shoe store last night... Cleaned the place out, nothing left but work boots..."
"MFW I'm bread and I have to remind people to put the twist tie back on the packaging Fuck I mold"