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Joke of the Day

"The Minnesota Twins have just signed Adrian Peterson to a 3 year deal. More details to come. All we know is Adrian will be a switch hitter."

"Jerry (Man pukes in plastic bag) Man:I made breakfast, let's put it in the fridge (Puts it in toilet tank) Man:Time for bed (Crawls in to tub)"

"Hey, everyone in a minivan-- hit the gas!"

"*drinking my first beer with my dad* ""I can't believe you made me eat the other ones"""

"A penis lives a sad life.. His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, neighbor is an asshole, best friend is a pussy and owner beats him."

"How can you spot a blind guy at a nudist colony? It's not hard."

"Girls are like blackjack... Girls are like blackjack... I'm trying to go for 21 but I always hit on 14."

"My girlfriend is ambidextrose she can polish off a box of chocolates with either hand."

"*Condom Co* [ok, don't let them know ur a frog] ""Any ideas how we can make our condoms more pleasurable for her?"" ME: Ribbit ""Genius"""

"11 years ago, Greece won the Euro 2004 Today, they would be happy with 2004 Euro's."