74463

Joke of the Day

"I don't get it Friend: ""1980's called, they want their music back"" Me: ""The mirror called, they want their joke back"" Friend: ""I don't get it"""

"%3. Ask Questions. 4. Use the face."

"I always say ""I was wondering when you'd find me"" when I get in my car. That way if someone's ever in the backseat I'll look cool as shit."

"My math teacher called me average. How mean."

"I'm stuck somewhere between playing my cards right & not playing with a full deck."

"""That's what."" -She."

"My girlfriend says her doctor said no sex for 2 weeks ..ahh oh k but what your dentist say..!"

"How many drinks do I buy a girl if I want her to come home with me and clean up my room?"

"""What the FUCK is going on?!?!?"" - the Moon (July 21, 1969)"

"Your boss will respect you more if you sometimes disagree, especially if you touch their face and say ""You silly goose."""