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Joke of the Day

"my ex has had a really hard time moving on. from what i can tell through his blinds, he is currently eating (something we always did)"

"What swims slightly faster than a shark? The Little Mermaid on her period."

"The generation of today are so allergic to everything, future wars will be fought by throwing bags of peanuts and cat hair at each other."

"The one knock knock joke I'm sure you've never heard. ...Silence...."

"What's the worst thing about sex? Buffering."

"What is the only thing that will be ""Feeling the Bern""? Working people's wallets."

"Sometimes I lay in bed awake at night thinking, how did Skeletor from He-Man speak perfectly without lips or a tongue"

"Q: Did you hear about the blond Bear? A: Got stuck in a hunter's trap, chewed off it's 2 paws and 1 leg, and was still stuck."

"there should be 1 line at every store for people who have their shit together"

"Q: What illness are you suffering from if you keep seeing cartoon animals who talk? A: Disney spells."